Poemetry by T.A. Barnhart

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2021-3-26

i was supposed to be living
better than this;
that was the agreement
i made
in exchange for being free....
2021-3-22

life is hard enough
without the need
to start over
every damn day.
i wake, tired....
2021-3-21

you are asking a lot
to ask me to
care about others
when so few other
care about me.
2021-3-19

i keep hoping to find
that secret crime
locked inside my head,
that heinous act
committed against me....
2021-3-18

some people can afford
for life to be unfair.
literally.
i cannot.
i cannot pull out....
2021-3-15

you pick your god,
and i’ll deny mine,
and the other 7 billion
lost and hopeless
will do as they choose....
2021-3-14

i have to admit
although i was
genius enough
to invent
a time machine....
2021-3-9

“i have never been free
to live my life!”
sounds like the kind of
hyperbolic nonsense
an angsty seventeen-year-old....
2021-3-5

when they said
i was too old,
that i was
useless & uncool
and no longer....
2021-2-26

i still want my life
to mean something
in a way
that relieves me
of responsibility....
2021-2-17

have you ever wondered
what it would be like
to be the world’s greatest
living human being
who ever lived?
2020-2-15

i do not believe
in myself,
which makes
being myself
living my self....
2020-2-11

when i sit
in the hoped-for quiet
of my practice,
only two things
disturb that quiet....
2021-2-9

i need to talk about
the people who have
treated me so badly,
and i need to name names.
no one deserves....
2021-2-8

i have my story,
and it is my story,
and it is me.
i fear my story,
and i hate my story....
2021-2-7

i think my dreams
are tired of me
telling them
to shut up.
dreams are not meant....
2021-1-29

i wish it were easier,
this dream of mine
to be alive.
instead, i struggle
to merely wake.
2021-1-28

being me
is not the worst thing
that could have
happened to me,
but it’s bad enough.
2021-1-21

sitting in my room
waiting for the snow to come,
but it may be
a week away.
that’s ok....
2021-1-17

i’d like to think better of myself,
but i find that’s hard to do
given that its me.
my long habit,
my comfort zone....
2021-1-10

the window, open
by my head
as i wait for sleep,
cool air and warm coverings,
but sleep just doesn’t....

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