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2021-3-29
a room full of kids
being kids
and a son
i haven’t seen for so long
that he now has....
being kids
and a son
i haven’t seen for so long
that he now has....
2021-3-26
i was supposed to be living
better than this;
that was the agreement
i made
in exchange for being free....
better than this;
that was the agreement
i made
in exchange for being free....
2021-3-22
life is hard enough
without the need
to start over
every damn day.
i wake, tired....
without the need
to start over
every damn day.
i wake, tired....
2021-3-21
you are asking a lot
to ask me to
care about others
when so few other
care about me.
to ask me to
care about others
when so few other
care about me.
2021-3-19
i keep hoping to find
that secret crime
locked inside my head,
that heinous act
committed against me....
that secret crime
locked inside my head,
that heinous act
committed against me....
2021-3-18
some people can afford
for life to be unfair.
literally.
i cannot.
i cannot pull out....
for life to be unfair.
literally.
i cannot.
i cannot pull out....
2021-3-15
you pick your god,
and i’ll deny mine,
and the other 7 billion
lost and hopeless
will do as they choose....
and i’ll deny mine,
and the other 7 billion
lost and hopeless
will do as they choose....
2021-3-9
“i have never been free
to live my life!”
sounds like the kind of
hyperbolic nonsense
an angsty seventeen-year-old....
to live my life!”
sounds like the kind of
hyperbolic nonsense
an angsty seventeen-year-old....
2021-2-26
i still want my life
to mean something
in a way
that relieves me
of responsibility....
to mean something
in a way
that relieves me
of responsibility....
2021-2-17
have you ever wondered
what it would be like
to be the world’s greatest
living human being
who ever lived?
what it would be like
to be the world’s greatest
living human being
who ever lived?
2020-2-11
when i sit
in the hoped-for quiet
of my practice,
only two things
disturb that quiet....
in the hoped-for quiet
of my practice,
only two things
disturb that quiet....
2021-2-9
i need to talk about
the people who have
treated me so badly,
and i need to name names.
no one deserves....
the people who have
treated me so badly,
and i need to name names.
no one deserves....
2021-2-8
i have my story,
and it is my story,
and it is me.
i fear my story,
and i hate my story....
and it is my story,
and it is me.
i fear my story,
and i hate my story....
2021-2-7
i think my dreams
are tired of me
telling them
to shut up.
dreams are not meant....
are tired of me
telling them
to shut up.
dreams are not meant....
2021-1-29
i wish it were easier,
this dream of mine
to be alive.
instead, i struggle
to merely wake.
this dream of mine
to be alive.
instead, i struggle
to merely wake.
2021-1-28
being me
is not the worst thing
that could have
happened to me,
but it’s bad enough.
is not the worst thing
that could have
happened to me,
but it’s bad enough.
2021-1-21
sitting in my room
waiting for the snow to come,
but it may be
a week away.
that’s ok....
waiting for the snow to come,
but it may be
a week away.
that’s ok....
2021-1-17
i’d like to think better of myself,
but i find that’s hard to do
given that its me.
my long habit,
my comfort zone....
but i find that’s hard to do
given that its me.
my long habit,
my comfort zone....
©2019 – 2022 T.A. Barnhart
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